Blindingly bright, burning up in the atmosphere. How could I look anywhere else?
Will you burn up, or will you crash to Earth so I can meet you?
---
--- --- ---
--- --- --- --- ---
I've decided.
I wasn't going to chase Buck anymore. I've tried again and again to make him mine, only to be rejected at every turn. I don't know how much more I could take of that. Maybe, if I ignored him long enough, it would stop hurting.
So I figured I would start anew. I still wanted to make at least ten friends in Twinbrook - half of my lifetime goal - but only had about five friends to my name. It was time to go out and meet someone new.
I figured the Red Rendezvous was a good a place as any to start making friends. Trying to keep a cheerful demeanor, I headed over to the Foosball table and started chatting with the stranger there.
"Mind if I play?" I asked, keeping my tone light.
"Sure! Kinda hard to play by myself. My brother over there was playing, but he's a sore loser." he replied, gesturing to another red head across the bar.
"Ha ha, I'll try to be more graceful than him then!"
I found out that his name was Hayden, and that he was in the musical career. And, perhaps for the best, he was married. That meant I could be normal friends with him without all of the messy complications of a romantic relationship.
Hayden and I were fast friends. I found out that he was just as charismatic as I was, and that we could charm the club goers into the palms of our hands. It was great talking to another 'people person'.
"Thanks Hayden." I said to him after a couple of hours, straining to be heard over the noise. "I really needed someone to talk to. I was pretty bummed out when I came in, you know."
He grinned childishly. "Glad to help. You're not so bad company yourself."
I started to smile. "Good to know I'm tolerable."
Then, without warning, Hayden pulled me into a friendly hug.
"Hey, whatever made you upset, forget about it, okay? You're a bright, pretty girl that any of the blokes in this bar would love to talk to. Whoever upset you is just a jerk."
I don't know how Hayden was able to glean that much from our conversation, but I was glad he did. Those were the exact words I needed to hear.
"Thank you Hayden. So much."
Eventually Hayden had to leave, but he made sure I had his phone number if I ever wanted to hang out sometime. I told him that he could be certain I would call - I wanted Hayden and I to become best friends at this point!
Not long after he left, I started to feel queasy. Cursing that bartender and his mysterious mango cocktails, I dashed for the basement bathrooms.
The floor was dirty and my phone was ringing and my head was pounding and all I wanted to do was go home. The fun, it seemed, was over for me.
But then a week passed and I was still sick.
This wasn't normal. First of all, I never get sick - I never missed a day of school as a kid. Secondly, this wasn't a normal illness - I would puke when I got up, scarf down a huge breakfast, and then be totally fine for the rest of the day. It just didn't add up.
Well, until I started counting the days.
I went over the weeks over and over again, frantically trying to convince myself that I was just late and that there was no way I was...I was...
I had to call Jupiter. She was the only friend I had that had ever had a baby.
Jupiter dragged me to the convenience store and waited patiently outside while I took a pregnancy test. Moments later, I came storming out.
"It's got to be wrong."
She raised an eyebrow. "Oh?"
"I...I can't be pregnant."
"That's more of a 'That'll ruin everything!' can't than a 'No way is this physically possible.' can't, isn't it?"
My hands dropped to my belly defensively. "It wouldn't ruin everything. I...I like babies. And it's definitely possible. But Jupiter, I made up my mind not to talk to Buck anymore."
"You have to tell him about this, Yume."
But I merely shook my head and backed away, hands still protectively over my stomach. Then, I turned and ran. What was I running from...?
I don't think I was paying attention to where I was going, because when I stopped to catch my breath I found myself on the far south side of town.
Then a familiar voice rang out. "Yume! Hey!"
"Hayden!" I gasped. "I...uh...hey."
"Why didn't you call me? I thought we were going to hang out. Or are you avoiding me?" he chuckled.
I gaped at him, and his cheerful expression fell in the face of my panicked countenance. "Yume? Are you...?"
"I'm pregnant."
The words blurted out of my mouth before I could even think of a proper response.
"Ah...oh." was Hayden's response.
Soon I was backing away from him too, still panicking. I didn't know what I was going to do, but I didn't want Hayden to see me completely melt down. I still wanted to be able to be friends with him when I could finally show my face in public again.
I ran home without another word.
I was grateful that I got time off of work, because I wasn't sure I could show my face in public after that embarrassing debacle.
Strange how something I thought was so shocking a few months ago seemed so obvious now. And heck, I was excited! Being a single mother didn't worry me - I was more worried about what would happen if Buck ever found out.
But I'd be fine...right?
One morning there was a knock at the door. This was pretty strange, because I told my handful of friends that I wasn't really in the visiting mood. Curious, I opened the door.
"H-Hayden!" I squeaked as he made his way into my living room. "I, uh...um."
"You said that last time too." he chuckled.
"S-sorry. Hi." I managed. Of course he would come over now, when I was all obviously pregnant. "Um, what's the occasion?"
"I wanted to apologize, actually." he chuckled.
"You? For what? I'm the one who blurted out all my problems and ran off." I responded, dumbstruck.
"And I let you run. Honestly, I thought you were trouble and decided to leave it at that. But the more I thought about it, the more I realized that you were just in trouble. So I thought, as an apology, I could offer to keep being your friend, if you'll let me."
I must have had the biggest, most idiotic grin on my face then.
"You're a brave man to befriend a crazy pregnant woman." I said.
Hayden laughed. "And there's the Yume I met at the bar! I should've guessed that you'd be the same, pregnant or not."
He glanced down at my pregnant belly, so I stuck out as far as I could. "This kid's gonna be a monster like me. Already kicking up a storm! Go ahead, feel."
The second Hayden laid a hand on me, my baby gave a furious kick that startled us both. I burst out laughing - this kid and I got along already!
"You've already influenced your child in the womb, huh." Hayden said with a sardonic grin.
"Ah, well, what can I say."
And then, as we stood there smiling and bonding over my baby, I got this crazy notion. Yeah, I barely knew him. Yeah, I knew that this is what got me in trouble in the first place. But suddenly, I wished that I had his kid in there.
Ah, I'm in trouble, aren't I?
--- --- --- --- ---
--- --- ---
---
Meteor, meteor, please don't fade away.
--- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---